{God's} Love & Basketball

You wouldn't know it by looking at her, but this girl was drowning in chaos. My middle school years were marked with trauma that left me spiraling into drugs, alcohol, an eating disorder, and behavioral issues at school from the young age of 11.  I came from a stable, two parent home where I was loved unconditionally and they were often left with more questions then answers as to why I had changed so drastically.

My saving grace during these years was basketball. It came naturally to me (thanks for the good genes Dad) and I could escape the chaos during practices and games. It gave me a community of girls who had good, innocent fun without all the drama. It allowed me to be a kid during a time when in other areas of my life I had to grow up quickly. It gave me coaches who would encourage me and speak life into me. In fact, one of my coaches even became my Sunday School teacher who had a huge role in me finding Jesus. And last but not least, it was pure fun!

That's me in the back row holding the fake cardinal. I've always been unique, guys. 

Fast forward about 15 to 20 years and here I am still shooting hoops when I can.

As a 30 year old, I have the benefit of looking back and realizing that God gave me basketball. It sounds ridiculous, I know. But in those years where God was the last thing on my mind, He was still chasing me. God knew what had happened to me because He was there. (That fact has been one of deep questioning and deep comfort for me.) God knew I would need something to fill me back up, something to give my hurting soul a break, and something to heal through.

I don't know where you are at in your life.

+ Maybe you're a parent of a child who is struggling and you're not sure where it's coming from. Please hear me, God's got them. He's chasing them even in the most subtle ways. Trust Him.

+ Maybe you're a young adult who is questioning where God was during a dark time in your life. Please hear me, God's had you. You must look back over even the smallest details and see He was there providing for you in ways you didn't even realize.

+ Maybe you're a preteen (or adult, let's be real) caught in a mess that you never saw coming. Please hear me, God has not deserted you. He sees your pain. He is big enough to handle your anger and sadness. He's carrying you through this, even if you're being carried like a screaming, kicking toddler.

I want to take a moment and just thank my parents. My dad calls me his "wild child" which I certainly earned and am glad we can laugh about it now but it also came with a lot of stress for both him and my mother. Thank you both for loving me, cheering me on at all my basketball games, praying for me constantly, and for always sticking by my side even when I was awful to be around.