My oldest son had recently started testing the waters of calling me by my first name instead of Mom. At first it was something I giggled and shook my head at but then after a few days, it started to feel icky. I realized that I needed to sit him down and explain that although it was funny the first few times, it wasn't funny anymore. In fact, it was coming across as disrespectful. He listened and then replied, "But Mom, Daddy calls you Meg. Why can't I?"
He made a valid point. However, I'm an authority figure for him as my son. I made the analogy that he would never think to call his teacher at school by her first name. It's out of respect that we call her Mrs. Smith because the terminology we use for people matter.
In the adoption world, the terminology we use for each side of the triad carries a tremendous amount of weight. This is especially true when it comes to the woman making an adoption plan for her unborn baby.
We use the term Expectant Mother when a mother is pregnant and making an adoption plan.
We use the term Birth Mother when a mother has given birth and signed the paperwork to allow a hopeful adoptive family to raise her baby.
We use these different terms to respect that a mother who has an adoption plan for her baby is still the person who makes the decisions for her baby until paperwork is signed. She is not called a birth mother until after paperwork is signed.
+ If you are interested in learning more about adoption and the services we provide at Christian Adoption Consultants, I would love to chat! Feel free to email me at meg@christianadoptionconsultant.com. +
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